Haven Behavioral Senior Care, Thornton Colorado

Well, that’s where Mom is, now…
I keep thinking that things are going to calm down, up here.  But, I guess I haven’t learned all that God wants me to learn from all of this.  I keep saying that I’m a fast study and it’s OK to get this over with.

Over the past few weeks, Mom’s ability to enjoy activities and to keep herself focused on the reality at hand instead of the frightening thoughts that she has about the devil and drowning and walking in the water and all the rest…was becoming more of a problem.  We were making cookies and preparing for a Halloween bash at Mom’s Heidi’s Chateau, where Mom has been living, Last Saturday, when Mom began screaming…shrieking curl your toes kind of screaming.  She said that she couldn’t control it and that it felt terrible.  That first day the only way I could get her to stop was to scream, myself….to scream so much that I made myself hoarse.  I screamed  to the top of my lungs every time that she did, until she decided she could stop.   We would talk about it between screams and I had hoped that it was just a one time release for her.  But, it wasn’t.

The girls were so frightened by it that I’ve tried to keep them away from her since.  Her crazy thoughts accelerated and by Tuesday I finally found a mental hospital in Thornton(that’s by Denver and is 5 hours from here) to admit her to.  Finding a place like this has been really hard to do.  I can’t believe that we have so little offered to older people who are loosing a grip and need some attention and guidance.  I don’t know what would have happened to her, if she didn’t have a family.  She couldn’t stay at the assisted living facility in the present condition.  I couldn’t even take her to a hotel!  Her local Psychiatrist could only see her every few weeks and it was obvious that she needed step by step monitoring of the drugs that we were using.   I was really at a loss of where to turn next.

Anyway, it’s been pretty dramatic around here, at least under the skin.  I’ve done my best to keep things up and happy for the girls.  But, it has just been pretty awful for me.  They have acted like nothing much has happened and I hope that they feel that way.

Craig agreed to help me take Mom over to Denver and it turned out to be such a blessing.  Just as we approached Denver and all of the rush-hour traffic, Mom’s medication wore off and she began screaming and trying to get out of the van in traffic.  The child proof locks, we found out, only worked in the BACK seat and we had HER in the FRONT!  I had to restrain her from over the back of the seat, with her trying to bite me and scratch me and smash my hands against the door frame.  I bruised up her arms, keeping her safe.  I still feel like I’ve been beaten up.  That was a rough position to stay in for over an hour, while Craig tried to find his way in traffic and around construction to the hospital.  So, we left her there and haven’t really been able to hear any answers since leaving her on Tuesday.  I do hope that they will talk to me more, tomorrow.  They have eluded to the fact that screaming is kind of common for them to deal with and that the Serequel (the medication she was taking) may have contributed to this acute anxiousness.  That’s good news unless they can’t find something else to help with her terrible fears and lack of reasoning.  So, we keep praying.

At least I know that I won’t get a call in the night asking me to come pick her up.  At least I know that I won’t hear her haunting screams while I’m trying to sleep, unless I’m dreaming.  At least I know that she is at the place that…if anyone can help, they can…They are in the business of helping people like this, who can’t help themselves.   I pray that Mother will be someone they can help.

She’d love to get a card from you.  She can receive mail and if you’d like to send her a card, mail it to:

Dena Kleinsorge, c/o Haven Behavioral Senior Care, 8451 Pearl Street, Thornton, CO 80229

Though we know that God is watching over her, she feels that she’s pretty alone in all of this.  Along with her dilutions, she has lost much of her faith in God and His protection and this is the saddest thing that I’ve watch happen.  She is still so confused, thinking that Satan has powers that her faith cannot compete with.   She knows everyone, remembers everything.  But she has such fears and anxious thoughts about each and every moment.  It’s so hard to see my own mother struggling like this.  I love her so much.  Some may think that it doesn’t matter if I spend time with her.  Even through all of this craziness, she would find my business card with my picture on it in the car and would put the picture to her face and kiss it and place it very caringly in her pocket for later.  Then I would see her take it out every now and then and kiss it again.  I know that she still feels and understands love and I have to show her my love when I can.  I hope to speak to the doctors tomorrow and get a feel for what they think.  I do think that it’s very possible that the medications are contributing to the acute actions that she’s taking…with the screaming and such.  But, we’ll just have to pray and stand by and watch.  She loves you all and is very appreciative of your prayers and cards, as am I.

I’ll probably go over this weekend to be sure that she is well cared for with my own eyes.  I think she’s in good hands, however.

Love to you, as usual,  ‘night,  Mary